Today is our son’s first day of Kindergarten and I am sitting here crying like a baby.

I’m doing it for all the typical reasons;

• He’s growing so fast
• His first experience of school
• He was nervous (and so am I)

But one of the biggest reasons I’m sitting here is because my husband isn’t.  He should be here.  He is missing out on these big occasions.

No, he is not dead. No, he is not in the military.

He has something else that keeps him away…the pipeline.

Have you heard of it? Probably just the protests, right? A topic for another time.

In case you have not heard of it…our country is full of pipelines that run under and above the ground. They crisscross our nation like the veins in our body, providing a supply of liquid and gas that our country depends on.

They help transport liquid petroleum and natural gas to help create products we use EVERY DAY like our cell phones, TVs, fuel for our cars, heat to our homes, etc.   You can read about pipelines here.

Another story, another time.

Let’s get back to our story…

The kids and I decided to come back about a week before so I had time to get the school supplies from the list, figure out timing (for driving), plan out lunches (I’m failing here) and overall scheduling.

We also wanted to give our son a bit of time to adjust back home before entering a new situation.  To have time to run around and enjoy summer at the big house.  To get used to sleeping in a new bed and place.

It is such an exciting time and yet so hard on our family.

For an undetermined amount of time we will be apart from my husband, their daddy.  He is staying back to work, to provide for our family. Unless he gets laid off soon, we most likely won’t see him until around Thanksgiving break.  He is about 8 hours away and that is just too hard on two littles for a weekend trip.

This is a job that we chose before we had children.  My husband has worked so hard to get where he is and has become damn good at what he does. As a family we support him!  We know it will be hard and the visits will not come often enough but it is a short-term game at this point.

Although, this was a choice we made, it doesn’t make it any easier.

The kids and I get to be back in our home.  Making new friends and enjoying our new town.  We get to check out our festivals, sports and whatever else we can find.  We have all these things to keep us busy along with navigating school and all the things that come along with daily life.

While it can be fun doing these things, it is also bittersweet.

It’s hard for me to not think about the fact that he will miss out on different activities or the excitement of making a new friend.  He will miss out on the bedtime routine, the homework and even simple things like pickup and drop-off.

He doesn’t get to hold our sons hand at the dentist when he is scared.

He doesn’t get to wipe our daughters tears away when she gets hurt.

But he wants to.

He doesn’t get to teach them how to ride bikes.

He doesn’t get to snuggle with them every night.

But he wants to.

I often don’t send him as many pictures when we are apart.  Not because I don’t think that he should see them.  I worry about how it will affect him.  I don’t want him to miss them more than he already does but I don’t want him to miss out either.

We know there are options.

Trust me when I say that we have talked about a lot of them.  Our minds have changed several times already.  We know there are options for schooling.  Homeschooling or to just change schools whenever we moved is an option.

I know many families that are doing these things successfully and it works for them.  But each of us is different.  We feel this is what are family needs right now.

We also know there is always a way to make something work.  So, for now we are finding ways to make being apart work for our family. Technology certainly helps.  FaceTime is often used as signal allows.

Our family talks daily, even if it is only for a few minutes.  We keep the kids informed on what is happening and encourage them to be engaged in the conversation.

Please don’t mistake this post as looking for sympathy.

We know this is the path that we have chosen.  We have a plan and right now, this separation, this difficult situation is a part of that plan.

This post is more for those that are also experiencing this same situation.  I just want you to know that you are not alone.  There are others going through separation just like you.

It may not be for the same reasons but they know the heartache you feel.  The questions you have unanswered.  They have family and friends that just don’t understand.

There are others that loved this lifestyle but now want it to change so desperately.  Some are trapped financially and trying to figure a way out.  Others just love this work and are not ready to walk away from it.

Whatever the situation, there are others out there that are negotiating similar situations.  Trying to do the best for their family.

This post is for you. I hope you know that there are others out there, experiencing similar situations with our travel lifestyle. You are not alone.

Ways to help ease the separation…

• FaceTime, Skype, Zoom are great tools to have so that you can have a sense of connection.  They help by providing you with video calls.  You get to see each other while you chat.  We do this daily as long as he has a decent signal.
• Talk.  I’m mean really talk.  Separation makes things seem worse than they are sometimes.  You need to be able to share what you are feeling so things don’t get mixed up or lost in translation.
• Put yourself in their “shoes”.  Try to see things from the other person’s point of view.  Both parties are struggling with different things when separated.  My husband is so good at this, I need to do better.  It’s easy to get wrapped up in whatever we are dealing with that we don’t always stop to see what they are going through also.
• Make time for visits as often as possible.  Obviously this varies on distance and schedules but if you can make something work, DO IT!
• Find support.  Talk to people that can relate or are at least willing to listen.  If you need help finding places for support, check out my post about some resources here.
• If you don’t like the situation, make a plan to change it!

If you can relate and want to share, I would love to hear from you!  Drop a comment below!

As always, thanks for reading!

–Kate

Consider finding work while you travel.

Traveling with your significant other can be filled with fun and new adventures but it can also get REAL boring and lonely too.

We all have different reasons for wanting to make money while traveling…maybe it is

• a creative outlet
• extra income
• meet others
• need more than being a stay at home mom (me raising my hand!)
• security in case something happens

Whatever the reason, there are options, EVEN while traveling.

Seasonal jobs

Most large corporations as well as some small businesses will often look for seasonal help.  That season depends on their industry. Sometimes it is summer help for outdoor companies or businesses related to warmer temps.  Other times it is focused more around the holidays, usually end of October to January.  This type of work provides flexibility because it is temporary.

Nationwide companies

If you want something steadier, look for nationwide companies that may allow you to transfer as you change locations.  For part of my time with Con-way Freight (now XPO Logistics), I was able to transfer to different terminals since they were a nationwide company.

Work at home

This type of work provides the ultimate flexibility because it can go wherever you go!  In most cases you are the boss as well so there is no checking to make sure you can transfer your work.

• MLMs

MLMs often get a bad rap.  They get called names like pyramid and Ponzi schemes but their structure is very similar to corporate America.  You have a president, then VPs, then Managers, then workers.  If you drew it out it would look much like a pyramid! There are a variety of different industries/products out there that involve MLMs.  Find one that fits your interests!

• Create something

Maybe you are a creative person.  Do you love to craft?  Have you designed something unique or improved on something already out there?   You could start an online store and sell what you make.  Depending on what it is you are creating, will determine how easily you could run the business on the road.

• Virtual assistants

Do you have administrative or specialized skills, a computer, phone and time to complete the tasks?  Do you enjoy helping others get the job done?  You could sign up to be a VA for online companies or better yet, start your own VA business!

• Transcriptionist

Transcription is another great option for working from home.  You need fast typing skills, a computer and an ability to pick up words from a variety of people.  Most people think of medical transcription in this category but there are many other types. Check out Rev.com for a listing of current jobs as well as opportunities to do captions for TV programming.

• Recruiting

If you are detail oriented, enjoy working, helping and talking with people then consider recruiting.  Recruiters get to help others find jobs.  Although many companies require a degree for this position you do have the option of creating your own freelance business.

• Customer Service

People skills are a must for this type of work!  A good portion of this position is done from a phone and/or email.  So, as long as you have good signal and enjoy talking to people this could be a great fit for you!

• Writer

Do what I do, share your thoughts with others!  You could write a book or blog, depending on your goals around writing. Both formats have the potential to bring in income and you definitely have the flexibility of working from anywhere. If this interests you, feel free to message me about any questions you have.  Check out the course that got me started here

Help others

Not all significant others travel with their Pipeliner.  We all know that they put in long hours most days and could use an extra hand.  If you are looking to make money while traveling, consider offering some of the following services to help out the other Pipeliners on the job;

• Pet sitter
• Baby sitter
• Laundry or cleaning
• Grocery shopping
• Running errands

Improve your skills

This option is not great on a resume if repeated over a long period but it does get you out of your small living space and meet others!  If you choose to, look for places you could get a discount like your favorite retail store. You could also find your favorite coffee shop or bookstore.  Another idea is to think of a new skill you would like to learn or improve on and try a place that offers it.

Work with significant other/on pipeline

Another option is to also work on the road.  This could be a bit more difficult if you have children only because of the added need for childcare if you both are out of the home for long hours.  If you can make it work then there are a few options;

• Many women opt to be their significant other’s helper (welders)
• Laborer
• Safety
• X-ray teams
• Office staff

Some choose to work directly with their significant other while others choose to work on a different crew.  Take in the factors of needing childcare, amount of time spent with each other and the type of work to help you decide if this would be a good fit for you and your family.

As I mentioned before, there are a variety of reasons to take up employment while traveling.

Here are my reasons…

In the 12 years we have been traveling together I have held a couple of the jobs above and also spent about 2.5 years at home while he traveled.

I worked at a tanning salon because I wanted to meet others.

We needed the extra income so, I took a job at Con-way and stayed home for 2.5 years and then transferred terminal to terminal.  His job was not very stable at the time (long lay-offs) and we had acquired too much debt.

I worked my first MLM because of pregnancy hormones and boredom.

My second MLM was started to get healthy and have extra income.

My current endeavors have been started to begin an exit strategy from this line of work.  Our kids will be starting school and we have chosen to be stationary for them.  This means our family will be split until we can get my husband off the road.

If you decide to seek employment, I encourage you to find something that you have an interest in and do enjoy.  Remember that it is ok to try something, not like it and then try something different. Don’t trap yourself in a job that makes you unhappy.

Please feel free to comment or send a message to me with any questions about working on the road.

If you are currently working or thinking about working on the road comment below.  I’d love to hear what you are doing!

If you are looking for other ways to beat the isolation, check out my post here.

As always, thanks for reading!

–Katie

SO where do you start?

Most likely you don’t know anyone (yet) and are still getting used to navigating the area.

GOOGLE SEARCH

My go to start position is Google search or whatever search engine you use.  Type in a hobby that you are interested in and the location.  Or look for local parks, churches, community centers, whatever you may have an interest in and want to explore.

That search can send you down a rabbit hole quickly if you let it so try to focus on what you want out of your activity.

Do you want to create something?  Do you want to see something new?  Do you want a chance to meet new people?

FB EVENTS

My next tool is FB events and local groups.  FB and the internet in general can be helpful for finding new experience while traveling across the country!  Just follow these simple steps

• Click on the events section off to the left of your main page.
• Search your local area and a time frame…this week, next week or certain dates.

I’ve been able to find a lot of fun, local events that I did not find using my search engine.  These were anywhere from a charity run to a crafting class or local tasting of food or drink.

When I first started traveling, we didn’t have kids so most of my activities revolved around shopping or hiking.  I was more of an introvert than I am these days so I was ok with solo activities while my husband was working.  (Just make sure you let someone know where you are going and when you will be back.)

I just NEEDED to get out of the trailer!!

We were lucky enough to be near some great hiking and scenic places so I would take our pups with me and go for a hike that usually ended in me carrying our dog, Piglet.  He had lots of energy but just a little guy so he didn’t hang for long. Pig in a pocket pic included for cuteness!

I also found myself doing quite a bit of shopping in certain locations which wasn’t exactly good for the pocketbook!  I had to refocus my activity choices and find something else besides shopping.  Which takes us to my next suggestion…

GET A JOB

The first time I got a job while traveling (outside of helping at a campground), we were just outside of Washington D.C.  We were living in a house FULL of people but I needed some space and new faces.  One of our roommates started at a local tanning salon.  She mentioned that they were still looking for help so I went for it.

Not exactly what I was looking for but I am so glad that I took a chance!  Everyone there was so nice!  I got great work experience, training and so much more.  I ended up making two friends from there who helped me out a ton with our pup, filling in for my lack of friends and just being very supportive.

OPTIONS WITH KIDS 

Now, we have our two littles so I try finding new experiences while traveling that they would enjoy.  Below are my top choices;

• Zoos
• Craft classes
• Gymnastics/dance classes
• Local mall with a children’s area or bounce house
• Mom groups can be found on FB

Really, anything to get them out of the trailer as well as burn off some energy!  Trust me, you NEED this for your sanity!!

COMMUNITY BOARDS

In the more remote locations, I often would be willing to drive a bit further for an activity but there may be other options such as a local church, community group, boards in the grocery store or post office.

I admit, I have not used this resource much.  I have been successful with the previous options and just haven’t had to use this one. Most will have a community board with things going on around town and if they do not, they usually have people who will be willing to help you find something or someone.

EXERCISE

There might not always be things close to where you are staying, in those instances, start with a daily walk.

It is amazing what just getting outside can do for your mental health!!  Ah, the power of sunshine and fresh air!

Plus, it gives you exposure to other people, who may be able to suggest new experiences or new places!!  In these more isolated places try to resist the urge to always curl up and binge TV/surf the internet.  Those days can be just as rewarding but only on an occasional basis.

Speaking of exercise, places that offer exercise options are a great resource.  Not only do you get to move but you have the chance to meet others. Some places, like most YMCAs, offer a child care option too while you are taking your class.

FACEBOOK GROUPS

Don’t miss out on this great resource…pipeline groups found on Facebook.  Here you can connect with other traveling ladies in your area and continue to stay in touch with them!

There are a ton of groups out there so you just have to find the one that works for you.  Just use the search tab on FB and type in “pipeline” or “pipeline wives”.  That should get you started with several options.

In addition to those groups be sure to join Pipeline Ladies Lunching.  This group organizes lunch gatherings all over.  Again, just search for your current location or post and ask if anyone is around you.  I wish I had known about this group from the beginning!  It’s so nice to have a standing meeting once a week and plan trips, shopping or just another get together.

If you don’t see something in your area, you can always start something!  Post in the groups that already exist and ask for people to join you on an outing.  Or you can create your own group if you are not finding what you are looking for in your area.

The point is that you don’t have to be so isolated.  There are millions of people on this earth and many have the same interests, problems and desires as you do!  If you need help on finding people to connect with while traveling check out my post here

As always, thanks for reading!

–Katie

Do you struggle with loneliness while traveling?  Even if you are not traveling alone it can still affect you.

Loneliness isn’t just an issue for those of us traveling but it is definitely a common feeling among us. Once the excitement of a new place has worn off and we start working on our schedules, it can start to feel a little mundane.

These are the moments that we would generally lean in on our family and friends.  Ask someone to go out for lunch or a drink.  Come over for a movie or talk in general. 

Unfortunately, when we are traveling those people are not generally available.  A phone call may work for a bit but sometimes you just need someone to physically be near you.

I know I do!  Don’t even need to have conversation with them (introvert here), I just need them near.  

My experience

For the first few years I relied heavily on my husband and on phone calls home.  This wasn’t fair to those people or myself.  I would find myself so frustrated when my husband worked late or stopped with the guys on the way home without me.  

I recall a particular moment within the first year of traveling.  My boyfriend (we weren’t married yet) went out with the guys before coming home.  He didn’t call initially so I got worried about where he was.  Once he did call, I was already worked up and upset.  We got in an argument on the phone which in turn, he stayed longer.  By the time he came home I was curled up in a ball, crying my eyes out.  I felt so alone.  

What was strange for me in that moment is that this wasn’t the first time I had traveled somewhere new and didn’t know anyone.  I had done it for almost 7 years prior to meeting him.  

Why is this so different?

What was different is that I was staying home all day by myself and expecting to socialize with him when he got home.  I had been doing that all week and by the end I was just plain lonely.

The same for my family, if someone didn’t answer the phone (usually because they were working) I would get so down.  Thoughts came to me like, “They don’t want to talk to me” or “They don’t have time for me”.  I was in the middle of depression and didn’t even realize it.  

I stopped calling people for a while, I just couldn’t handle the “rejection” of an unanswered phone. This lasted for a few weeks, the sadness, crying, laziness and just being a recluse in general.  It wasn’t until I had a conversation with a family member, that I realized I was depressed.  This person helped me understand what it was and offered suggestions to try to bring myself out of it.  

Whew, that got a little dark but I have to tell you that it is not always rainbows and unicorns traveling like this.  There are definitely plenty of amazing, beautiful, “I can’t believe we are living this life!” type moments but there can be just as many like what I mentioned above. Be aware of how you are feeling and know that there are ways you can change it with help!

These are a few things that I tried….

I asked the campground if they needed help.  They did! They hired me to work in the office a few hours during the week and Sunday mornings.  In exchange, we got my hours knocked off of our rent.  I watered the plants, organized/cleaned the small store and also assisted with reservations and parking.  This helped because I had to get myself together each morning to take care of the plants.  I also got to talk to other people and help them get situated for their stay.

I started looking for activities to keep me occupied during the off days.  There was a big city nearby that I checked out.  Shopping can be a good outlet with a budget in mind.  I became a “tour guide” for visitors (my brother in law’s girlfriend, a friend and some family).  

I started my phone calls again including a more regular call to the family member that helped me.  When I made calls I was more conscious of what time.  This way I could have a better chance of them actually being able to answer.  If someone wasn’t available then I took my dog for a walk to clear my mind.

Other options that I was not aware of at the time or are now available…

Pipeline groups on FB

There are a ton!  Find one or two that you feel you have a connection with.  Ask if anyone is near where you are and have a meetup!  There is also a Pipeline Ladies Lunching group where groups of ladies in different locations get together once a week to have lunch and socialize.  This is such a great resource!  I wish I had known about it sooner but did not until about 2015.  These groups have helped me meet quite a few ladies on different jobs that have been so supportive while we were together but also continue as we move to different places.

Company sponsored events

This is generally more common in the warmer months or around a holiday.  Some companies will put together a cook out or potluck.  We had a company this past year put on a trunk or treat for our families so we had a safe place to go.

Volunteer/community work

Find something you enjoy and volunteer in the local community.  This 

gives you a great avenue to meet some local people and give back.

Join a gym/YMCA

Exercise can do wonders for your mental health!  Join a local gym to improve or maintain your health.  Try a new class out and meet some new people!!

Find a job

Boredom is definitely hard to deal with and if you end up using shopping all the time as a coping mechanism then it could cause financial issues as well.  Finding a job can help break up boredom, give you extra money and might introduce you to a new friend.  Look for something that you would enjoy and maybe something different than what you are used to.  Don’t torture yourself and get something you dread going to each day.

We are social people by nature whether we are an extrovert or an introvert.  We crave being around others.  Don’t lock yourself away in your home on wheels when there is so much to see and do!

IF you are struggling with depression, reach out.  Talk to family, friends or a professional.  I’m here too!!

Here are a few links;

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.orgor 1-800-273-8255

https://www.crisistextline.org/depressionor text CONNECT to 741741

As always, thanks for reading!

–Katie